My life has never felt better than it does today. I had that same thought yesterday, but then I woke this morning next to my personal Jesus in my own Eden. Marrying Morgan and moving to Alabama has made me happier than I’ve ever been. And I can’t stand it.

If you’re looking for an update on what the Tulley’s have been up to, here ya go. We got married almost a month ago and immediately moved to Tuscaloosa, Al. We had no money, no friends and no home; we should have been miserable but we learned to drink in each other’s company like the gallons of water we have to consume to survive in the southern heat. But we found an apartment we liked and moved right in. This complex has two pools. TWO! I got so sunburnt the first weekend. The southern sun is no joke.

El Morgo started her orientation at Druid City Hospital last week, while I sit in our bed (we have no furniture, so the bed is the only place to be) and wait for her to get home. And that’s the update. We still have no money or friends, but we do have a home.

Okay, you’re updated. Now here’s what’s going on inside my head.

Morgan and I have spent multiple nights walking around the University of Alabama campus and the Tuscaloosa Riverwalk playing Pokemon together. That right there is the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me. Let me break it down for you math-nerds out there. 1 hot-as-fuck wife + the game that defined my whole life (more on that in the future) + the lush, beautiful city I’ve been dreaming of since childhood x how many times I got to grab Morgan’s booty = 1 effervescent Chris Tulley. This new bubbly persona I’ve adopted has killed my short story about the death of a young woman, my poems about dreaming of my own coffin and nights full of cheap beer and cigarettes. Those used to be what gave me life, but I’ve been given a new life here in Tuscaloosa.

For roughly the last ten years, I have been a dismal excuse for a human being. I’m not saying that I was a sad sack, down on my luck teen turned adult, but I’ve always had a thing for bleak places. My very existence was based around my disdain for other people, which pushed me onto myself. I’m at my best when I’m in my own head. I cherish being able to sit alone for hours on end, getting lost in video games, drowning in sad music and directing tragic scenes in my head. But since I got married and moved away from Indiana, I lost that ability.

I enjoy a lot of things that could define me. Taking fitness seriously and working out; finding the bottom of a good bottle of rum; and marathoning Game Grumps and Spider-Man comics. But at the end of every day, I’m just a writer; hopefully an artist. My typical doodles, poems and posts are dark, crude and cynical, but I can’t produce those anymore. Morgan and the move have warped me into some cheerful person. I’d argue to say I’m downright jolly. People in the south are infinitely more social than those in the north. There’s no contest. Everyone talks to everyone else here, and I’m a victim of it too. If you knew me before the move, you know that I just don’t like talking to people. Especially in public. In Tuscaloosa, you can’t avoid chatting with neighbors, bar-goers and other wannabe Pokemon masters. And somehow, I don’t hate it. I’m thriving here.

I’m not complaining, because I am enthralled by the changes that have been made as of late. But if I am going to survive, I’ll have to keep adjusting. I have to find a new voice, a new, lighter and uplifting approach to my days.

Oooh! One last shot. *Cough cough* “Today we lay to rest Chris Tulley, of the cold, cruel north of Indiana. May we never forget his shaggy hair, cynicism and crappy punk rock band t-shirts, or his love for Nirvana and insulting his friends. May he rest as he lived, in the dark.”