In last week’s From Toddler to Teen edition, I told y’all how my past dictated the music choice at my wedding. This week, a little symbol called the fleur-de-lis is going to explain the last two pieces, the setting and color theme of me and Morgan’s big day. You see, the fleur-de-lis represents two organizations my identity is tied to, The Boy Scouts of America and the New Orleans Saints.

Before I earned my wings and grew into the majestic eagle I am today, I was a lowly cub (scout, that is). Becoming an Eagle Scout is one of my (very, very few) achievements. Clearly I was an adorable little Cub, but as I got older, I was not as proud of Scouting as I am now.

I fully believe that the Boy Scouts are an outstanding organization that teaches important social and life skills. But I didn’t always feel that way. If it weren’t for my dad coercing me into not quitting after I finished Cub Scouts, I’m afraid I would’ve walked away from something great. You see, the jump from Elementary to Middle School really affects teenage boys. They basically become pimply little assholes that then grow into full-sized teen assholes (more on that next week).

Simply put, being a Boy Scout was not cool during a time when being cool was all that counted. This is probably when I learned that being a “cool kid” actually sucked. I was mocked for still being a scout, as most boys quit scouting between Cub and Boy Scouts. Other things like sports become more important. I wish I could recall how many times I was called gay for sleeping in tents with other guys.

So no, Scouting never gained me any popularity points in school. But I have to thank the Boy Scouts of America for two things. 1. Teaching me that my dad is fuckin’ awesome. 2. That camping and nature is somehow more awesome than my dad.

PSA: Nature is sweet. There might not be anything I love more than camping. Maybe canoeing? Na. There aren’t campfires in canoes. Camping is the best. One summer, my sweet-ass bro Jeremiah spent three weeks straight in the woods, and some of my most cherished memories come from those times.

So when I value something as much as I do nature, I have to tie that into the biggest day of my life right? Right. And I’m #blessed enough to have a wife that agrees with me. Our wedding in the woods, at an abandoned Scout Camp, was picture perfect. I’m convinced that Indiana has never looked better than on the day of my wedding in the woods.

No one in Indiana has ever looked better than our bridal party, either. I don’t know about the bridesmaid’s dresses (Morgan probably just liked that color)  but my guys were decked out in black and gold for a reason; my uncle Michael’s forearm tattoo.

Ever since I can remember, I idolized my uncle Mike. He’s like the Rolling Stones and my mom’s the Beatles. When I was a kid (and still, if he reads this) he was the cool uncle. And on his arm is that fleur-de-lis, the emblem of the New Orleans Saints (and of course, the Boy Scouts). So when childhood me put together that the symbol represented both the Scouts and the Saints, I instantly became a Saints fan (Who Dat!)

Right in line with how I make all my life choices (I did make my wife move to Alabama just for football), when I got to choose my groomsmen’s colors, black and gold was the obvious choice.

And that, along with last week’s entry, is the story of my wedding. The music was influenced by my rebellious, nerdy childhood, the setting rested on my lifelong commitment to Scouting and the colors were fashioned around a mediocre football team.

Next week, we are diving into the most embarrassing moment of my childhood, one that I have never told to anyone on the planet. It’s gonna be deep and it’s gonna be cringe-worthy. Till then, peace out Boy Scout!

Fast Fact! My favorite childhood movie was Land Before Time.

Fast Fact! In the third grade, my teacher told me being a paleontologist was impossible (I think she thought I had the dumb)

Fast Fact! I drive my wife bonkers by playing with my hair, which I can now pull down to my chin.

Fast Fact! I smoked grape Swisher Sweets in high school because I was “edgy”.