Welcome back, fearless readers! 2017 is here and I have some things to say. New year means new site identity, new direction but the same content I’ve tricked you into loving.

This time last year, I published my review of 2015. It was a brutal year that I’d rather not recall, save for a few good moments that you can read about here. If you chose to follow that rabbit hole, I hope you noticed how far this site has come in a year. I remember being ecstatic that a couple hundred people read that review post, but Life Above The Ground (r.i.p.) saw over 3,000 visitors in 2016. THANK YOU ALL!

The Dope Things

Like the aptly named subhead above implies, dope things happened last year. I will now rank them from Least Dope to Most Dope.

Our big move is first on the list. Morgan and I made our sweet home in Alabama! Y’all listen up here, the dirty south is the place to be. As I’m typing this at 11:40 p.m. on January 16, it is 66 degrees outside in Tuscaloosa. I’ve had my AC running since we got here on June 27. I love that I’m close to my roots as I experience the town my parents and grandparents grew up in. I’m close to family members I rarely saw as a child, and their southern hospitality is the truth. Plus, the Alabama Crimson Tide were undefeated in 2016 (I’m not ready to talk about the Clemson rematch) and the whole city was alive with Tide fans like ourselves. Living ten minutes from stadium is a dream come true. We only went to one game this season, but being here is more than enough.

The Big Easy. Morgan, four of our closest friends and I rang in 2016 with the best bang imaginable, by spending a week in New Orleans. We stalked Drew Brees, ate beignets and seafood, biked through graveyards and experienced Bourbon Street. The entire trip was a party, and it’s one I need to make again soon. Unfortunately, Bourbon Street got the best of me as I partied too hard and couldn’t stay awake to see the ball drop. In a way, I think that was the most “Chris Tulley” way to start a year off.

Tiny Cat. Up until halfway through 2016, I hated cats. That’s 23.5 years of feline loathing. I can confidently say that I had never shown a cat affection until I was convinced to purchase one late last year. I still hate cats, but I love my cat. Blake Nine-Livesly (named after the goddess herself, Blake Lively) is the most dope surprise of 2016. Our little family performs daily rituals, which include cuddles, purring and loudly swearing due to numerous flesh wounds.

Baby Maya. I can proudly say that I am personally responsible for creating new life in 2016. While my wife and I remain mostly babyless, I did play matchmaker for two of my best friends. Kiah and Morgan are two of the most genuine, creative and driven people I know, and they did it! Baby Maya and I have a connection like that weird werewolf and vampire baby from Twilight, except without the weird sexual overtones. When 2016 started, I was not on speaking terms with her parents (because I’m an asshole), but now that we’re 700 miles apart, we’re closer than ever.

Before I unveil the most dope event (which shouldn’t be a surprise), here are the Dope Honorable Mentions: I reported on a speech by the venerable President Obama. Being mere yards from him was honor. I met Tim Tebow and Blake Sims, both successful SEC quarterbacks in their own right.Morgan graduated college and got a big-girl nursing position at the hospital both my mom and grandma were born in. Morgan and I experienced our first (of hopefully multiple) Avett Brothers concert in Fort Wayne in April. We then treated Jensen (my delightful younger sister) to a Brand New/ Front Bottoms/ Modern Baseball concert in Birmingham in November. I got to work as a bartender with two real cool dudes. My nephew Scott can say my name (he’s two, give him a break), I got nude on a beach, met a plethora of new friends, got three tattoos, zero haircuts and gave zero fucks.

No drumroll needed, the most dope thing of 2016 was my wedding. I GOT MARRIED! Morgan ranks pretty high on the Dopeometer, but her willingness to put up with my wonky ass on the daily helps her nab the number 1 spot. The wedding itself was nearly as stunning as my bride, and so were the bridesmaids (heyyy Carlita). My loyal groomsmen were then the icing on the cake, except we didn’t have wedding cake, we had wedding donuts! How dope is that? The people most important to us were there, the entire event went swimmingly and I remember almost all of the after-party.

Like all good years, this one too had its shares of tragedies to make the good days seem better. Honestly though, and I’m a pretty pessimistic guy, there were only two terrible things worth talking about in 2016. The first was on me. I spent the first half of the year working as a journalist, reporting daily on the truth around me. I worked with some wise people and was proud of where I was. Once we moved, I found no such job. I’ve worked at Best Buy since July to pay some bills, and while I deeply love some of my coworkers, I hate that place. My professional life has taken steps back, but this blog does give me some semblance that I’m on the right track.

The second tragedy is on all of us. Look, I apologise if this upsets anyone but I need to say it. I despise Donald Trump. I hate his platform, I hate his lack of ethics, I hate his Twitter grammar and I hate his hair. The political system is fucked for both major parties, but I’d being lying if I said I think Trump will bring any good. We’re losing a man whom I don’t always agree with, but at least carried himself with the dignity and repertoire a world leader should have, and gaining one who belittles journalism and women, two of my favorite things in life.

All in all, 2016 was the best year of my life. It was a year of “more” for me and I can only hope I keep the trend up.